In love marriages, the man directly proposes to the woman. In semi-arranged marriages, the first or second visit may include a formal proposal, since both the man and woman have already agreed to marriage prior - the proposal is more or less a formality. Once both parties are in agreement, a proposal party ( شادی کا پیام) is held at the bride's home, where the groom's parents and family elders formally ask the bride's parents for her hand in marriage. Following the first visit, both the man and woman have their say in whether or not they would like a follow up to this visit. In arranged marriages, the first visit is purely for the parties to become acquainted with one another and does not include a formal proposal. Once a decision has been made by either the man or woman or both, one or more representatives of the potential groom's family pay a visit to the potential bride's family. Without family consent, marriages are usually frowned upon. Such “free-will” challenges traditional mindsets as it "dishonours" the powerful institution in Pakistani society - the family. Love marriages (also known as court marriages) are rare, since the concept of "family consent" has been eliminated.However, if both agree upon marriage, the potential groom will approach his family to send a proposal to the family of the potential bride. This process can occur over a span of a few months to a few years and may or may not culminate in marriage.
Both the man and woman have usually had several “meet and greet” opportunities, thereby allowing both to gain a sense of familiarity. Semi-arranged marriage is a growing trend where both men and women interact with one another before marriage (a form of dating).This form of marriage is considered traditional, but is losing popularity among the newer generations. The groom and bride have usually never met before, and any interaction between them is akin to small talk with a stranger. Arranged marriage occurs when a member of the family, a close friend or a third person party helps bring two supposedly compatible people together in matrimony.Most marriages in Pakistan are traditional arranged marriages, semi-arranged marriages or love marriages. Beyond age 20, both men and women are considered potential grooms and brides. Searching for a potential groom or bride ( رشتہ تلاش کرنا) is the first step of traditional Pakistani marriages. 3.3 Potohari / Pahari/ Panjistani weddingsīefore the wedding Search.